You may be familiar with the term “spiritual bypassing” referring to the “tendency to use spiritual ideas and practices to sidestep or avoid facing unresolved emotional issues, psychological wounds, and unfinished developmental tasks.” coined by John Welwood in 1984.
Cognitive bypassing is very similar (I guess coined by me, now), except that it also massively sucks your energy.
You know you’re cognitively bypassing when you jump out of your body and into your head when faced with an uncomfortable emotion. When you immediately try to fix “it” (the discomfort) with logic and reason while ignoring the emotions. When you don’t give yourself the time or the space to experience those emotions, to get closer to them, to figuratively sit with and get to know them.
To unpack them.
To process them.
To release them.
Until you unpack and process emotions that have been hanging out, suppressed and repressed, you won’t be free of them. Valuable energy you could be using for living life becomes devoted to containing the emotions and keeping them out of sight. As the cycle continues and more emotions are suppressed or repressed, more energy is needed to keep them from daylight.
How do you stop this energy-sucking cycle?
- Stay in your body.
- Stay with the emotion. If you can’t stay with it in the moment, return to it (same day) so you can unpack, process, release it.
- As other uncomfortable emotions get triggered, follow each thread, unpacking, processing, and releasing as you go.
Another option is to join me for the second round of the women’s Worthiness Masterclass. During this 5 week workshop series I will guide you through unpacking, processing, and releasing shame so you can reclaim your worthiness. Women called to this will learn how to identify when they are in shame, identify the ways they are coping with shame that are actually creating more shame, and how to effectively unpack, process, and release old shame stories. We will meet in person for 4 weeks (Mondays August 7th, 14th, 21st, and 28th, 6:30-8pm at the Guild in Cardiff, CA) and have the last session via Zoom on Tuesday September 5th.
If this resonates and you would like to reclaim your worthiness and your energy, call or text me at 760-456-9488 to set up a time for us to have a conversation about it.